if existence has weight, then action is the depression it causes. or maybe entropy, or maybe thats the sum total of action. but it feels good to think about, and i think one of the things i miss about richmond was the feeling of entropy, spent and wasted and sent hurling out through the night. sometimes it was crushing, sometimes momentous and the catalyst for great things. There are days though when life is not bad by any means, but i am plagued by this great feeling of a burden, and i think its just what it feels like to be right in where all your sensory experience flows in; its so heavy. when i am aware of it i am mesmerized by its impossible mechanics, off and on apt to do nothing because of it.Micah, I think Richmond is a good incubator….a kind of limbo or purgatory. I hope that the wait to leave is not so indefinite and infinite for me. How is life, studies, and art-making?
Life is slow but dense, and good. Studies are going great, anyhow my grades are good. I’m getting a good dose of inspiration from my psychology and philosophy classes, mental temperance from pre-calc (ha, i wish i could say i had done calculus years ago, too much dicking off in high school), love for words stimulated by medical terminology. I have been steadily weaning myself off of the ideas i had about what art ought to be, and more onto the painting and drawing and writing that not only suit me (not in the self-satisfied sense but more like becoming comfortable with) but challenge me with their problems of design and intuition that go against those old parameters that contributed to a total lack of production. I have even reconnected with an old artist friend whose garage is basically a studio and is stocked with endless supplies, and she has been kind enough to open it up to me. I’m still hunting for a job, and beside all the trite necessities it will allow me i hope to reward myself with a brand new, shiny camera. Any suggestions? I’m horrible with picking technology that is “right for [me].” Video and sound ideas never stop, and my friend bobby and my guitars leave me raring to go in the music realm. Hoping to combine the two once i get my hands on that camera and sound recorder, that is- music and video.
